There’s a lot of bullshit floating around the Internet, especially when it comes to dating and relationships. There’s the case of 45-year-old armchair general virgins who’re giving advice ranging from approaching women to having healthy relationships. Or some random 23-year-old kid who finally lands a girlfriend for the first time in his life and somehow feels that he can mentor the entire world on what it is like to approach and date the world’s hottest women.
For instance, take something that every guy craves and wants: feminine women. Every guy on the entire Internet wants to date and marry one of these women. They feel that these women will be their salvation after years (and decades) of suffering through lots of “masculine” women that countries like the US and the UK are replete with.
But then, I get hundreds of emails from guys who complain how Russian or Ukrainian women—probably the epitome of feminine women—are bitchy, icy and just not as easy as they thought as they run back home with their tail between their legs. Or, worse, how they got ripped off in Russia or Ukraine by some girl they fell in love with after seeing her once or twice. And then curse the world how all Russian and Ukrainian women are “transactional.”
As someone who is originally from Ukraine and has lived in Ukraine for the past five years, I find these stories amusing. For once, there’s some truth in them—and an important lesson: femininity has its price.
Yes, Ukrainian women are extremely feminine. Russian women, too. But, as hopefully, you’ve learned from a very young age: there’s no free lunch. Everything costs something, including that mirage in the desert: femininity.
When it comes to feminine women, what no self-proclaimed guru will ever tell you is that there’s an intrinsic price attached to all that beautiful femininity. First of all, they know that they’re beautiful and feminine. Even in a place like Ukraine, where virtually every woman is feminine, they all know their prices. Yes, their price.
They also know very well how to read men and what kind of hoops they need to make men jump through before getting access to the goods—if ever.
The more feminine the woman, the higher the price, the more time investment, the more sophisticated the “shit tests” before you’re considered as a contestant for the ultimate prize.
The more feminine the woman, the more masculine you have to be. And here’s where most of you fail. There’s a good chance that most of you reading this are from the developed world (more than half of my traffic comes from the USA, UK, and Canada), and big metropolitan cities like New York or London aren’t exactly known as bastions of masculinity.
So, if you’re not 100% (or even 80%) masculine, then you’re part feminine or at least have certain feminine characteristics like getting in touch with your feelings, saying things like “I love you,” missing a woman, or arguing with women when you should shut the fuck up and let the woman vent.
And this is where you fail because a high-quality feminine woman has been around enough tough masculine men who don’t entertain her bullshit or respond to her tests to know what a truly masculine man is. And you’re probably not it.
And this is why a feminine woman picks on up on this and plays you for a fool.
Most likely you behave this way because you were raised in a single parent household—by your mother or were raised in an environment where the mother held the upper hand in the relationship and the father simply nodded his head and did whatever the woman wanted.
The specifics of your childhood don’t matter all that much, what matters is that your understanding of feminine and masculine roles is upside down. All compounded by the fact that you’re insecure as heck and were conditioned by a feminized Western society to be “in touch with your feelings” and other crap.
But that’s not what real women want. I haven’t heard of any guy whose woman dumped him because he was “too masculine” or because his masculine frame was super strong. I also don’t know any guy whose woman left him for a man who was “in touch with his feminine side.” And, I certainly don’t know any man whose woman dumped him because he was so busy with his work that he barely had time to see her instead of some chump who did nothing but worship the ground she walked on.
If you want to get what you want from women—whether it’s a reliable midnight booty call, a great relationship or even marriage—you must adhere to a certain hidden dynamic whether you like it or not. No, it’s not negotiable. It’s not something that you can “talk about” at the kitchen table with your girl. It’s something that you do (or don’t do).
So, as you can probably guess, the problem isn’t with feminine women. The problem is with you. You’re the problem.
You’re the problem because everything you’ve ever been thought about masculinity was wrong. Women don’t want a “buddy” they can “hang out” with. They don’t want a man who they can easily get under the skin and turn into an emotional cesspool. And they certainly don’t want a guy who’s in touch with their emotional side—whatever the fuck that means—even if they tell that that’s what they want.
It’s all one giant test which you’ve been failing repeatedly. Not because you said the wrong word at the wrong time but because you weren’t even in the race. Everything about you demonstrated that you’re just not masculine enough to dominate her, to control the situation and make her feel like a woman. And if you can’t make her feel like a woman, then nothing you say or do matter. It’s like trying putting a V8 engine into a Honda Civic. Even with a powerful engine, it’s still a freaking Civic and it will never run as a tightly as a BMW or a Ferrari.
The point is that everything begins with a solid foundation: the masculine frame. And everything spreads from there. When you have a weak foundation and you might as well stay home instead of going outside. Doesn’t matter what comes out of your mouth.
No stupid pickup line is going to compensate for a man with feminine behavior. That's like putting a bandaid on the Titanic after its hull has been ripped apart by an iceberg.
Moreover, merely meeting women is relatively easy. Let’s face it, it’s purely a numbers game; the only thing that you need is the willingness to approach the girl and put the ball in her court.
Relationships or, in other words, a situation where you have to be masculine all the fucking time is a lot harder. That’s why women initiate 80-90% of the divorces. Mostly because the man gets weak and complacent over time and stops being the man that initially seduced her (I’m not talking about the gold diggers).
For the past ten years, I’ve been living abroad and dating a multitude of women from all over the world. But I’ve always been in long-term relationships, so I know a thing or two about staying masculine and keeping the attraction going over the span of months and years.
That’s especially been true in Eastern Europe—where I’m now—where women are ruthless at sniffing out all and any insecurities in a man. Most of you guys just wouldn’t last in Eastern Europe with a half-decent woman. It’s a lot trickier than what you believe. And save your “but they're so feminine” spiel for someone else.
On Friday, March 29, I will be releasing my new training: mindset, dating, and relationships. It will be a heck of a course where I will cover everything you need to know become and stay masculine in a feminized world. You will never look at mindset, women, dating, and relationships the same way ever again.